Sometimes offering help is an act of compassion— demonstrating that you care. 

And sometimes offering help means that you think the recipient cannot complete the task on his own and needs your assistance.

This is a tension when I visit my father.

My father is an 82 year old man who lives on a gorgeous property that requires much maintenance. His property has 30 acres of bush that constantly need to be beat back as they encroach on the trails and buildings.

Today we dealt with a dead tree that was threatening to fall on a shack. This task involved cables, ladders, a chain saw and a tractor to ensure it fell safely without damaging anything. 

My father was nimble enough to do much of the work even though he is clearly slowing down. I was grateful to help. He is aware I am keeping an eye on his physical abilities. Occasionally he will make a joke “Have I passed the test? Do I get to live here a bit longer?”