I was wondering about the long silence. ...Roderick

I am flattered that you were curious. Honestly most days have been routine-- work, maybe errands, meals, a little exercise, a little entertainment.

My birthday is Wednesday. Sunday we hosted my birthday BBQ. It was good to have people over. The cake was delicious. 

My brother-in-law shared an update about his family tree. Usually I don't blog about the lives of others. I'm making an exception here. I love this story. 

For a while I've known that my brother-in-law is only a half brother to my husband, though I’ve never known the full story. There is no doubt that my husband is his father's son. They look very similar. My brother-in-law, however, looks very different. 

Decades ago when my parents-in-law first met, my father-in-law knew my mother-in-law was seeing other men. When she became pregnant my father-in-law married her without question. Through out his life my brother-in-law was treated as a full son, never less. We all have great respect for my father-in-law because of that.

Flash forward to 2018. My brother in law is now sixty and curious about the details of his family tree. He had his DNA tested at Ancestry.com.

The results were unexpected. While his parents were German and Czech, he was 50% Mexican. 

My brother-in-law approached his mother about this discovery. She was embarrassed,  evasive and confused. She claimed she had never dated a Mexican even though the tests said otherwise. Eventually she recalled the name of his biological father who she insisted was Spanish. Not Mexican! Spanish!

 

My brother-in-law did some initial research and found that his biological father had passed away years earlier. With that, he set down his investigation and moved on. 

Over the next few years, Ancestry.com would occasionally point my brother-in-law to potential cousins, nephews, nieces, aunts, uncles and other distant relatives. He never pursued those connections.

At one point an aunt reached out to him and said "I'm the keeper of our family tree! I'd like to add you. How do you fit in?"

My brother-in-law responded that he was not ready to be a part of a new family tree. 

A few months ago Ancenstry.com matched a half-brother. The half-brother reached out to my brother-in-law. They started texting and slowly getting to know each other. About a month ago he flew to California to spend a weekend with his half brother and his wife.

As it turns out, their biological father had several kids with different mothers. This is why so many of them were on Ancestry.com. They are all reaching out, searching for lost relatives and building new relationships with those they find. They have welcomed my brother-in-law with open arms. 

I'm happy for my brother-in-law.

The weather has been perfect lately. Pleasant during the day. Cool sleeping weather at night. Wonderful sunsets for just to enjoy should we walk along the beach in the evening.

It sounds like the executives are about to make an offer for my replacement. I've interviewed him. He's a good guy. I'm staying out of the final decision which is fine as I don't have to live with the consequences. 

The org seems to be past the shock of all the departures. There is still some anxiety, but no one is asking "Am I next?" Hiring my replacement will help.

An old friend is staying at our place for a few days. He was one of my first roommates in University. 

It's good to catch up with him. We've been reminiscing and texting our old roommates. Were we as messy as we recall? Were we as impulsive with our major life decisions as it now seems?

My friend and I both started in STEM programs. Over time my friend became disillusioned with life in the corporate world. He became an activist. He first started volunteering for and later creating charities in Central and South America. He now leads a large NGO in Nicaragua. I've always admired his morals and ethics. But why Nicaragua? Even he doesn't have a great answer for that. He saw a need. He had the skills and time. So he made the choice. 

Gorgeous day today. I walked the dogs with my brother-in-law, went for a bike ride and read for a while. 

My husband is flying off to Alaska for his last work trip before we retire.

The weather has become pleasant in Seattle. The soil is now warm enough to plant the dahlia tubers that we acquired a few weeks ago. 

On social media there is "Free stuff" group for our neighborhood. About a month ago we asked if anyone had extra dahlia tubers. Within a couple days we received a garbage bag full of them. A pleasant surprise. They still need to be inspected and trimmed, but I'm looking forward to growing them, What type of dahlia are they? 

My mother-in-law's celebration of life is in about a month. Prior to his trouble with the law, our friend and his husband planned to attend.  We are wondering if they will follow through. My husband and I have discussed with with various AIs ("Act as if your are Miss Manors..." "Act as if you are Dear Abby...") they agree... We should un-invite our friend. Be kind but firm. Our priority is to the mourners and to minimize drama.