Small update on the work situation-- work from home will be expected until there is a vaccine or treatment for Covid. That could be a year or more out.

I scheduled a Zoom lunch for my teams at work. It turned out well. People were grateful for the social time. 

The husband continues to be a bit stir crazy. Last night, the husband suggested we go out for dinner. I suggested that I could would make dinner. He replied that he didn't want to do any cleaning afterwards. I assured him that I wold do all the cleaning

He firmly responded "I need to go out."

We had ordered burgers to go from a local restaurant. We ate them in the car and then drove around a bit. Toured some of the the little developments and neighborhoods that are popping up around here.

I continue to watch Rufus the hummingbird throughout the day. My office window looks out over the backyard so it's a pleasant distraction.

It turns out Rufous hummingbirds are very territorial. Rufus regularly chases away other hummingbirds. Our neighbors also have a hummingbird feeder which is part of his territory. He zips back and forth between the different feeders, and dive bombs any other hummingbird who dares take a sip. I've now know his attack trill and quickly look up when he's on the attack.

We got out a bit over the weekend.

Saturday we handed off our tax statements to our accountant. We were all masked. In fact, our accountant made us nice Seahawks masks.

Afterwards, we stopped by a bicycle store. At the store, no one but the husband and I were wearing masks.

On the way home we drove through the Tahoma National Cemetary. Very scenic. Very solomn.

Sunday we stopped by a friend's for his birthday. We brought our own lunch. They had theirs. We stayed on opposite sides of the room, eating & catching up.

After that we stopped by Clem & Bates to pick up some stuff of mine that I stored there. Clem and Bates are using the quarantine time to clean up and purge. They reminded me about the box and so we swung by and to retrieve it. We bumped elbows to say hello.

That little orange/brown blob on the end of the dead branch-- that's Rufus.

Posting this picture, I feel like I'm photographing Big Foot. He does exist! That blur really is him! He was far away and moved too fast. You believe me, don't you?

Exempting the pandemic, all is well here in the suburbs of Seattle. The weather is pleasant today. My work schedule has a enough free time that I should be all caught up by the end of the day.

Work wise, the company says that it will be at least a month before the offices are reopened.

We have named the hummingbird Rufus in honor of his species. No creativity there. Both the husband I occasionally peak out our back windows to see if he is on his perch.

Rufus leaves his perch for most of the afternoon. When I first noticed this, I worried about him-- just a little. Did something happen to him? Will he return? How big is the territory of a Rufous Hummingbird? What is he up to? Of course he returned later in the day.

One day he will leave our backyard without the courtesy of saying goodbye. Rufous hummingbirds are known for their long migrations. Late in the summer, if all stays well with him, he will fly down to Mexico.

We have a Rufus Humming Bird in our back yard. I've been watching him from my office for a few days now.

This humming bird will sit on a dead branch in a tree at the far end of our back yard. He surveys his territory. After a few minutes of surveying, he'll zoom off. Sometimes he'll sip from the feeders on our back deck. Sometimes he'll zoom away attending to other hummingbird things.

Then, five or ten minutes later, he'll return to the branch and survey things a little more.

The new normal.

Work is planning for it to be a long time before things return to normal.

Sometime, weeks from now, we will enter phase one. In phase one, our company will largely continue to work from home. If I wanted to work-from-work, I could book a desk. The number of desks that can be booked is very restricted. The desks are well distanced from each other. After I use a desk, it will be sanitized.

My SVP predicted that we would be in phase one by the end of the year.

Home life is going well. The husband is getting stir crazy. He is going grocery shopping more often than he should. He wears a mask. We washes his hand. I hope this all goes well.

Work has started talking about reopening. Nothing specific now, it's all contingencies. In two weeks, if the convid infection rates are declining, then we will enter phase one--  we will reopen the offices, but encourage people to work from home. After a few weeks, if phase one goes well, then we will enter phase two...

I can't blame them. 

Things have been quiet here. I've got a routine and it's working for me.

6ish, I wake up. I work out or run. I meditate for a few minutes. Then I have coffee and start planning the day. What are the most important things on my plate, and what are the next steps? What meetings do I have? What prep needs to be done? What do I need to review? Who am I having 1:1's with? What should we discuss? What should I do in the few open slots that I have between meetings? What do I need to follow up on?

Workday starts between 8:30 and 9:00. The mornings will go by quickly. Lately I've been booked through lunch, so I'll grab something quickly and eat during the noon call.

Then the afternoon starts. I have fewer meetings in the afternoon, so I can usually get some other work done then, writing, paperwork, who knows.

I try to schedule 1:1's at 4pm.

At 5pm I curate. I go through all my email, my notes and my work notifications then either delete, deal with them, or book time if the item needs real work. I'll double check any future commitments and make sure I know the next steps.

Some times I'm done by 5:05. Others I'm not done till 6:00

The Husband and my brother-in-law respect my day. They can tell that I'm very engaged with my job. The husband has mentioned that he doesn't like that I am sitting at a desk all day. With the pandemic, his job is in make-work mode. He has more free time. I am a little jealous.

Really though, I am happy that I have a great paying job in the middle of a crisis.

I'm pretty drained by the end of the day. The husband and I will have dinner. Maybe watch some TV.

8ish I'll have a cocktail. I don't drink a lot, so I make a good cocktail. I take out the necessary bar equipment. Measure and mix everything. Pour in a good glass and clean up.

Lately I've been having martini's with Aviator Gin. Before that it was Manhattans with nice Canadian whisky.

Then I'll read, or maybe I'll work on a puzzle with the husband.

In bed, lights out by 9:30pm. Gotta get my sleep for the next day.

We finished a jigsaw...

Our friend is getting better. The fever has broke and he is up and around.

Our roommate, our brother-in-law, is getting bored. Today, to amuse himself, he gave himself a perm.

We are starting to play online games with our friends. We've found a few social gaming sites like UnoFreak.com. We setup Zoom or Skype on a laptop, and then play games and chat or an hour. Its fun. It helps things feel normal for an hour.

Feel normal for an hour-- I spoke too soon. An internet connected karaoke mic just showed up. Apparently, this Saturday, we are schedule to sing karaoke with friends from Boston.

My work day is very full & busy. To be honest, I feel good about that. My days are going quickly.

I like getting up in the morning, showering, shaving, putting nice clothes, making myself presentable even if its just for a day of video calls. I could do it all from bed in a t-shirt. No one would care. I want to feel a little better about myself, even if it means a little more laundry and a little more work.

Our friend has fever and is quarantining. He is well enough to take care of himself. I hope things go well.

   

The weather is lovely today. The husband and I went out for a good hike up the hill behind us. We came across a few other hikers and gave them a wide birth. 

We have a friend who has tested positive for the Coronavirus. It's early on and he is only feeling a bit under the weather.

I last saw him three and a half weeks ago when we went skiing together, so I'm hoping that's far enough back. 

In other times, this would be a lovely spring. The weather is Seattle-nice-- some sun in the morning, followed by ten minutes of rain and hail, followed by cloud. I have the windows in my office opened a crack and am enjoying a cool spring breeze.

How should one deal with speculation and conspiracies? They are popping up on my FB page and I've had a roommate wonder out loud about one. As this pandemic proceeds, there will be anger and finger pointing from many. Anything to deflect responsibility. I have such a strong urge to directly engage, but that's not helpful. It just tags me as one of 'them.' 

So, I will just mute the post, or politely listen if someone engages me directt. Then I will guide the conversation to washing hands, distancing, finding masks, and saying the serenity prayer.

Life is going on here in the suburbs of Seattle. My job is busy. At the new job, the training wheels are off. We just had a reorg, and the size of my team tripled. I am spending a lot of time getting to know the team and the new responsibilities.

The husband is stressed. He is empathic. He is someone who likes to get involved and solve problems. It's tough for him to stay at home while the problem grows.

We go out for groceries every now and then. We've tried to order online, but the wait times are so long. Four or five days out. It's just not possible for us to plan our food that far ahead.

I look at the stats for Covid several times a day. I see that the death rate in LA is climbing like crazy. Hang in there Tommy. This disease is everywhere and still growing like crazy. 

While the news is constantly on in our home, I am tuning it out. Much of America won't take proper precautions until they personally know someone critically ill with Covid. That won't happen till there are tens of thousands of deaths. By that time, it will be weeks too late to prevent anything.

The next two months of news will be bleak.

Work is proceeding well. The husband has commented that I have very full days and suggested that I book time to take afternoon walks.

The brother-in-law says he gets anxious when he listens in on my video calls. We use so many technical words. It bugs him that we speak English, but he can't understand.

While the husband is also working from home, his job is turning more and more into make-work projects.

H, the roommate in the basement, has started teach yoga online. It's fun to listen in. She really knows her stuff.

The Brother-In-Law is working six days a week making and delivering food at the retirement home. He is getting tired. Get your rest, my brother-in-law. More people are depending on you, than on anyone else in this house. 

 We are filling our spare time any way we can. Puzzles, games TV. News. Too much news.

The "Stay Home" order has caused another round of grocery shortage. Nothing major, the same outage as before-- toilet paper, paper towels. Vegies and meat are freely available.

We also could not find another desk. The husband works from the living & dining room. This sometimes causes conflicts should the husband be on a conference call and the the brother in law want to watch TV.  So, we tried to find a desk for the spare bedroom. No dice.

But, smart TVs are cheap and readily available. The brother in law bought one for his bed room. Problem solved.

Our state has gone one step farther....

Gov. Jay Inslee spoke directly to Washingtonians to announce he will sign a statewide order that requires everyone in the state to stay home. The order will last for two weeks and could be extended.

This Stay Home, Stay Healthy order is similar to orders that other governors, in places such as California and New York, issued last week.

This proclamation will:

• Require every Washingtonian to stay home unless they need to pursue an essential activity.

• Ban all gatherings for social, spiritual and recreational purposes.

• Close all businesses except essential businesses.

“The less time we spend in public, the more lives we will save,” Inslee said. 

The proclamation states it’s still safe for people to go outside as long as they remain at least six feet from each other. Grocery stores, doctor’s offices and other essential businesses will remain open. People can still participate in activities such as bike rides, gardening, and dog walking — as long as they follow social distancing rules.

I sold my motorcycle today. I feel a little bad about that. I've had the motorcycle for years.

But, I haven't rode the cycle in a couple years. It's not practical anymore. I was riding the motorcycle often when there was an HOV lane to work and when I was with my ex. He worked on weekends so I had extra alone time.

Times have changed. Now, it just sits in the garage.

The guy who bought the motorcycle was a bit drunk and didn't know how to ride. Fortunately, he brought af friend who knew motorcycles and took it for a test ride.

The guy had recently come into a lot of cash-- he was cleaning schools closed due to the coronavirus.

After the test ride, the friend gave it his blessing. They paid cash. I signed over the title and the friend rode my bike off to it's next adventure.

The humble brag... that's what I'd call my last post. I must do less of that. 

The days of sheltering in place are passing buy. We are having a few home arguments, but nothing unexpected. We've had to adjust the Wi-Fi to accommodate the extra streaming and video calls that are being made.

How first world is that-- we are in the middle of a pandemic and the top problem on my list is that the house has enough Wi-Fi to let two people talk on video, and the other two watch Netflix, each far enough away from the other that we can't hear each other in the background.

We have made lists of people we want to keep in touch with and are calling them. I like this. Usually my work life and my few free social hours narrow down the people I talk to. Shelter-in-place lets me be more intentional. I will talk to those whom life would ordinarily keep distant from me. 

How on earth did I end up in a quarantine, with a great job that lets me work remote, and roommates who are a chef and a yoga instructor?

It's a quiet day today.  I had a full day working from home, as did the husband. The brother in law is home early from work as there is less for him to do at work. He works in the kitchen at a retirement home. The residents are in lock down. Meals are being delivered to them. 

I don't talk much about our other roomy-- H. We have a mother-in-law apartment that we rent to her. She is a good room mate. She walks the dog when we are not around. She is clean. Trust worthy. A good person. She is also out of work. The studios where she worked have closed due to the Coronavirus. She is keeping busy. She and the brother-in-law love to watch horror movies together. We have told her not to worry. These are unusual times and we aren't going to kick her out because she can't pay rent.

Its a lovely say here in Seattle. A little cool for spring. That hasn't stopped the daffodils from blooming.

The brother in law reports that at his work, a resident has tested positive for Coronavirus. The whole retirement community is in lockdown.

The husband and I are good. Our big challenge will be to keep focused and not to psych ourselves out. This is not a good time for empaths or those who like to engage and solve problems.

We have ordered a couple big jigsaw puzzles.

C2 was quickly in and out of town for the weekend to visit his family. While he was here, he got notice that he too will work from home.

It's official. All schools are closed for the next six weeks. Coworkers are scrambling to figure out what to do with their kids. My coworkers are fortunate-- they can work form home. I pray for those who can't work from home and now have to figure out what to do with their children.

A acquaintance has been quarantined. She is healthy, but is a real estate agent who was exposed to someone who has tested positive for Coronavirus.

The big thing for us is to keep our cool and keep focused on our work and our day. The husband and I listen to meditations before we sleep. This husband is big hearted and empathic. This situation really bugs him.

I have been working from home for a week now. Coronavirus continues to grow around us. Social distancing is now in vogue. I went to the dentist today. Ordinarily, when signing for the bill, I would just take the pen from the receptionist and sign. Today she put the pen down, stepped back. I took the pen, signed and then used hand sanitizer. She wiped the pen with a cloth. We looked at each other and laughed. What's next? Throwing the bill from across the room? 

The numbers don't look good. As statisticians sometimes say when doing analysis... the first derivative of the growth curve does not look good. The problem is growing faster than it's being solved. 

The state has banned events of more than 250 people. Seattle schools are closed. Suburban schools are not, though there are calls for that. The grocery stores are all open. Costco was out of beans and rice. The guy there said they get a new pallet every day, but it sells out quickly. 

We have a few emergency supplies on hand. Maybe one week of food. Lots of soap and cleaning supplies. Mostly I'm presuming that the system— groceries (especially grocery delivery), internet, power, gas— will continue to work if things start to go very bad. Amazon delivery can't help but benefit from this.  

The husband and I are in a demographic that recovers from Covid-19. I'm a little worried about the brother-in-law. He works at an old-folks home. He is over 60. He smokes. I pray for him.

So, what should one do in the middle of a coronavirus crisis? Head to the mountains of course!

For some time, an old college buddy of the husband planned to be in Seattle for the week. We had previously schedule a weekend with him at a local ski hill. While, they are closing down large gatherings around Seattle. Restrictions have not yet hit the rest of the state.

The trip was lovely.

Companies that can are asking their employees to work from home till the end of the month. To the best of my knowledge, no one where I work has been hit with the virus.

and then I see this...

Covid-19 update...

At work, they have put hand sanitizer dispensers up next to the main doors. It's kind of like a cruise ship. I sanitize every time I walk in or out of our space.

I am washing my hands more often. I'll do that when I arrive at work. Wash away the commute germs. My fingers are drying out, so I've got bottle of nice lotion on my desk.

Yes. I'm still going to work. The people who have been dying have been very young, had underlying health problems or were older than 70. I don't associate with those demographics, so if I get it, the damage will be contained.

More about work. The commute is nice. The traffic is good. There are less people on the bus. The office is quiet. If it weren't for the virus, this would be pleasant.

I have several friends in the travel industry. They are having a bad time.

My husband, who visits many medical offices for work, has been asked to stay away. The offices are closed to non-essential visitors.

What's bad about Covid-19 is that it's so diffuse and unpredictable. Our mind wants us to think that pandemics play out like the zombie apocalypse. Or a biologic attack where everyone dies. The reality is that most of us will be unaffected. Some of us will have a bad flu. We may not even know that the flu was the Coronavirus. It was a bad flu year even before Covid-19. And... of course... some of us will die.

Covid-19 is hitting Seattle a big way. 6 people have died in the past 48 hours. 5 of the six were older than 70. The remaining one was 50 and with an underlying health condition.

Work has canceled nonessential travel. Lunch is no longer buffet style. We have switched to box lunch. We are encouraging people to work from home. 

The brother-in-law works at an old age home. They are in lock down there. Servers are wearing masks. 

At my new job, I learnt that engineers need Senior VP approval to work evenings and weekends. Managers must roll model good behavior to support that.

I almost cried.

It makes the days really intense. Everyone works hard. There is little gossip or goofing off. I almost feel bad interrupting someone to ask a question. I really do my homework before I do so. I have to do a lot more planning to make all that happen.

I love it.

The past few days have been packed. So many trainings, so much information. 

I like the team. I like my boss. Off to a good start.

The new job is already ramping up. I fly to San Francisco for a few days next week for introductions and training, so I've had to book travel.

The husband has a flu and has been in bed for the past two days. My housemates and I have been having discussions about flues and vaccines. One of my roommates says the only time she ever got the flu is when she had the vaccine, so she has sworn them off.

I have the opposite opinion. I am vaccinated for the flu early every year. I used to get a big flat-on-my-ass-for-days flu once a year. The vaccine has eliminated that. Right now, I am also taking Tamaflu. When the husband came down with the flu, I thought he was vaccinated. and so I immediately got a prescription. I cannot afford to get sick right now with the new job starting next week.

Turns out the husband was not vaccinated.

I'm taking the Tamaflu anyways.

The doctor and pharmacist recommended that we wear face masks around anyone sick with the flu. Of course, there is a shortage of face masks right now. With the Corona virus scare, and with a heaver than average flu season, everyone seems to be sold out of face masks. Even Amazon says delivery for face masks will take one to three weeks.

I've been caring for the husband as much as I can. No biggie though. I check that he has water to drink, and that he eats a little every now and then.

Get vaccinated. They work and they are safe.

We spent a few days in Sacramento visiting the inlaws.

What do I want to say about that? Maybe-- "Empathy is a second to second, minute by minute service that we owe to everyone" -- Simone Sinek

My mother in law and my husband have a challenging relationship. Honestly, many people probably have a challenging relationship with the mother-in-law.

Unfortunately, there is a whole lot of not-listening going on. By everyone. It's easy to listen when you like those you are talking to. Empathy is only work, only deep, when you are talking to those you don't get along with.

She let's her dogs pee and poo indoors. She says they are too old to go outside regularly. The smell is terrible. Fortunately, she keeps the spare bedroom door closed at all times, so we could get away from it.

We cleaned the house up. Walked the dogs when we could.

The next time we visit Sacramento, we will stay in a hotel.

Even though I have accepted a job offer, I continue to talk to companies and go through interviews. Until I pass the background screen, and have a badge to enter the building, I will keep a few irons in the fire. 

Seattle has had lots of rain lately. Most days it's all day. We stay inside, watch movies, do what exercise we can. 

On Saturday, during a break in the rain, Clem and I went for a hike on the mountain. It's always good to spend some time with him. 

I've verbally accepted the job from the small local company. I'm continuing to meet with other companies until I physically sign, and I start work.

The fridge...

A few months ago we bought a new fridge. A nice, stainless steel, expensive new fridge. The husband loves the fridge.

It's already acquired a few dings. The microwave, and the oven are next to the fridge, and unless you close those doors, the fridge door will bump into the other door. The husband is frustrated every time he sees a new ding. With each new ding the husband talks to the perpetrator (me, the the brother-in-law, or the roommate) on the importance of checking the microwave and oven doors before opening the fridge door.

For the past few days, the husband has been traveling for work Yesterday, I thought I'd wash the fridge with a sponge The sponge has rough plastic on one side of it.

Now the fridge is covered with light scratches. Not deep scratches. But, the stainless steel reflects unevenly. It's not perfect like it was.

The brother-in-law, the roommate and I spent much time trying to figure out how to remove the scratches, brainstorming, googling, watching YouTube videos. We've tried several different products, but no luck Our last hope is a  professional scratch removal kit that is on the way from Amazon.

Then, this afternoon, before the husband boards the jet back to Seattle, I'm going to call him up and tell him tell him the news about the fridge.

I have a good job offer from the smaller local  company. This is a huge relief. 

The job hunt is intense. I'm having two or three calls a day with various recruiters, former coworkers, screeners or hiring managers. Going forward, I will have one or two onsite interviews a week for the next few weeks.

The interview process for all these companies is very extended. Each involves multiple calls from screeners and recruiters, and then and multiple onsite interviews.

The second onsite for the smaller local company went well. I should hear about next steps from them on Monday.

The recruiter from the big social network company said they will have a decision by the 17th.

Am back in Seattle. We were on a western Caribbean cruise with old friends of the husband. It was great to spend time with them. They are nice people. 

So far so good on job hunt. I've had a series of great initial interviews/conversations with a few companies. This Friday I will have a second set of onsite interviews with the interesting smaller company. Next week I have an onsite interview with the job-search company. Soon after that I will have an onsite interview with the search company. 

What on earth is going on with the Mississippi River south of NO?

A normal river would be content to end at the sea. The Mississippi, on the other hand, endeavors to split the sea into two. 

For centuries the Mississippi has been carrying sediment along, slowly extending its banks by hundreds of miles.

The Carnival ship that was side swiped last week. 

Last day in New Orleans. We've had a great time. Lots of coordination as the family we are with brought there kids. But wonderful non the less.

@Tommy, why didn't you tell me that New Orleans was so vibrant and charming?

Job search is proceeding.

Thursday and Friday I had interviews with an interesting smaller company. I think they went well. We shall see.

I still have not heard back from the social network company

Am also arranging interviews with the search company. Those will happen sometime in January.

Friday I had a big interview with the big social network company. I think I did well. I'm not going to dwell on it. Because of the holidays, it may be weeks before they get back to me.

Our cat has passed on. He took a turn for the worse about a week ago and we were treating him. But there was no improvement so we made a hard choice. He was an old cat, who had lost a lot of his agility, so I'm relived as well as sad.

And the interview I had a few weeks ago... they said a very polite "No," because they believe I am wrong for the role. They asked me to apply for other jobs at the company.

We've had a busy couple of weeks.

The job hunt is coming along. I've applied a lot, passed a few screening calls, and now am studying to pass the main, day long interviews. The material is pretty intense. There is a lot to read and to practice.

We have also been traveling. We spent a couple of days in LA, then went for a week long cruise to Cabo, Mazatlán and Puerto Vallarta.

Did you hear about the ship that was hit by the Norovirus? That was our ship.

Onboarding was a mess. They delayed everything by hours to allow the crew to sanitize.


During the cruise, Norovirus control meant that the staff was constantly sanitizing everything (tables, chairs, elevator buttons, railings, etc) and that everything had to be served. For example, you couldn’t just get a glass of water as passengers couldn’t touch the fountain. A steward had to pour and serve it for you.



At the buffet you couldn’t get your own plates or cutlery. They had to be served. Salt, pepper, butter, jam all had to be served separately. A simple ask like “May I have some toast?” took up a lot of serving time on a ship that was already full. It was a few days for the staff to figure out how to streamline these operations. I also got the feeling that by the end of the week, the staff was tired owing to all the extra sanitization and service duties that had been foisted on them. 

But, now we are back. I'm studying for work. All I need is one job offer.

One step further on the road to U.S. citizenship-- today, I had my finger prints and photo taken. 

I think the interview went well. We shall see. I got some positive feedback. Also, the hiring manager spent two hours with me; we talked a lot about what the job is actually like.

Life goes on. The BIL will be at our place for a few more weeks. He is trying to figure out his future.

Tomorrow I have an interview with a big company. I've been prepping for it for a while. The prep work is pretty much a full time job.

The interview is six hours long. I can bring notes and reference in.

Bring it on...

We picked up the BIL as scheduled. The first day at our home he told us he wasn't ready for deep conversations. He slept a bit, watched TV, ate. We talked about his trip to France. We talked about the news.

This morning he has started to open up to the Husband. They are resetting his passwords and going over his bank statement to see where the  money went.

He is hiding things in our bedroom (underwear, latex gloves) I'm sure he thinks he is being funny. I'm not ready for this brand of humor given what he's gone through. 

The flight from Paris to Seattle has an 8 hour layover in Heathrow. The husband happens to have cousins within commuting distance of Heathrow, so they met him at the airport. They are making sure he has some food and is getting proper rest.

Early in the morning they put him back on a jet for the final leg to Seattle.

I've packed up all the alcohol in the house and am storing it at Clem and Bates. I've also put locks on a couple of rooms with valuables.

When I dropped the alcohol off at Clem's, he asked why we were doing this. The BIL is free to live as he chooses. We have no obligation to rescue him.

We do have no obligation to rescue him.

This is the second time in my life that I've tried to help someone on a death-run. I no longer see the respect in it.

Live blogging the BIL (Brother In Law)

At three in the morning we received a call from the U.S. Embassy in France. The BIL was there. They were making him a new passport. The people on the phone seemed to care. They understood that he couldn't be trusted. They said they would watch over him the best they could. They also made it clear that the BIL is free man. If he chooses to leave, then he can't be stopped.

We cashed in many air miles and got him a ticket from Paris to Seattle. I booked him an Uber. I am pleasantly happy that someone in Seattle can book an Uber for a drive in France. The Uber driver was a bit confused when I explained the situation to him, but he went along with it.

Cars are not allowed at the U.S. Embassy since the Paris bombings, so the driver had to meet the BIL at a hotel down the street. Because the BIL lost his cell phone, we had a few tense minutes after the Embassy staff let the BIL out the door, but before the Uber driver confirmed that the BIL was in the car.

For an hour, I watched the Uber app as they drove towards the airport. The BIL is now at the airport. Security knows about him, and we've arranged for Wheel Chair assistance.

The flight has an overnight layover at London-Heathrow. He arrives in Seattle on Friday.

Keeping our fingers crossed.

Loving detachment... Should we have done this? This isn't the first time that the BIL has had an alcoholic meltdown. It won't be the last. The BIL has lost job after job due to alcohol. My Husband has rescued him far too often. 

The brother in law is still drunk in France. It sounds like the he somehow got his hands on more vodka, and just kept drinking, The B&B host eventually called emergency services and had him sent to the hospital. 

On the topic of my wayward brother-in-law, Tommy writes... "Sounds like the making of a good Southern Play....... where is Tennessee Williams when u need him."

It is. Want to fly to Paris?

The weather has been unusually gorgeous for this time of the year.

C2 was in town for the weekend. He now lives and works in Denver. He visits Washington State regularly as he has family here and he owns a few properties in the area.

C2 has stuff in storage in a few places. He has boxes at his sisters, at his dad's and at our place. He's had this stuff in storage for years.

We went through some of it this weekend. Most of it's near-garbage. You know-- stuff you don't need, yet is not in poor enough condition to throw out or give away.

A vegetable peeler. Internet routers. A shoe shine kit. An old LED alarm clock. A futon that's breaking down. Boxes and boxes of stuff. I'm encouraging C2 to throw it all out. He is still very attached to it.

C2 and his sister are not talking to each other. From what C2's step-mother said, they are both pointing fingers at each other. Neither will take responsibility for rebuilding their relationship. Neither shows empathy or curiosity.

Consider... "I'm in town. Do you want to meet?" v.s. "Hey. We haven't talked in a long time. Let's meet and catch up."

Its important to each that they be unrelentingly right. Or maybe they both want to play the victim to the others lack of social grace. 

We talked about showing empathy. C2 said "I can show empathy when I need to." My thought about empathy-- unless you can show it when you don't need to, then it's not really empathy. 

Family.

My brother in law-- when he's sober, he's a wonderful loving man. Danger, danger when he's not.

The brother-in-law spent a few weeks in France. Some of it was for a work-away. Some of it was at a Buddhist retreat.

Something happened on his way back to the States. The brother-in-law lost his passport. He made his way to the U.S. embassy and managed to call the Husband. The Husband wired him money to get a new passport.

Something happened after the brother-in-law picked up the money and before he got back to the embassy. The brother in law got drunk. He wound up somewhere. Maybe a hostel. He stayed there for a day. He lost the key to that room.

Since early this morning, the hostel owners and the brother-in-law has been on the phone with the Husband. The brother-in-law is asking for something. Not sure what. Mostly the brother-in-law is crying and saying he's sorry. The Husband has suggested to the room owners that they send the brother-in-law to the hospital to sober up.

The husband has been rescuing brother-in-law for years. Seriously, for years. I remember the husband helping out the brother-in-law over fifteen years ago when the brother-in-law had another melt down over drugs and alcohol.

The Husband is torn and has been reading about loving detachment. 

So far so good on the interviews. In the next month, I have two all day interviews coming up. These are with large companies.

I had two additional tech screens with smaller companies, but have not heard back from them. I've been told this is not unusual. Weeks from now they may ask me for another round of interviews. Or, I may never hear from them again.

I've started interviews. I've also started looking for an interview coach. I don't want to screw too many of them up.

The first call is with a recruiter. I generally pass those.

The second interview is deeper with someone who is generally hiring for the job. Different companies want very different things from their managers. Some want a manager who is super strong technically. Some want a manager who is great with the people, and differs all technical discussions to the team.

I try to be professional through it all.

I've started job hunting. So far, so good. Recruiters are willing to talk to me and I'm in the process of scheduling an on-site interview with an old-competitor.

Some old friends of the husband's stayed over Saturday night for a birthday celebration.

We also went out and attended a local haunted forest. The haunted forest is a fundraiser for the local Rotary club. It is a huge production! There were well over a hundred volunteers dressed up to scare. There were so many scary scenes. It was much fun. Parking, and the line to get in were crazy

Monday morning, I've started looking for a job. Mostly I'm polishing my resume, my LinkedIn profile and figuring out who the good recruiters are. 

I am trying to break my habit of regularly checking the internet. Writing is OK. Being creative or generative, that is good. But checking my email, Facebook, Reddit, Twitter, whatever. There is little need for that. I could check them once a week and I wouldn't miss a thing.

I am doing well with my time off. I am not bored. I had better not get used to this because I have to return to work.

I talked to my old boss— the one who was fired exactly one year before me. He suggested I take a couple weeks to decompress, and then start a job hunt. The time will go quickly.

I've spent the last couple of days, reading, exercising and purging— getting rid of stuff I will no longer need.

I'm also collecting ideas on how to approach my job search. I have an interview with an old competitor coming up. I want to use this as a learning interview, and not be desperate to take the first job offered to me.

The husband has been wonderful though this. Suggesting that I take the tine I need to decompress, and offering my suggestions of recruiters I can reach out to later.

I have an on-site interview with a competitor of the old company. I had a phone screen with them last week. This is good news, but I must be cautious. The competitor doesn't know that I am currently unemployed. That news could change things. 

We spent the weekend at Disney in California with Evan and Allen.

Allen called the event a Disneyathalon We walked over 10 miles each on Friday and Saturday. Then 5 more on Sunday.

We were in the park by 8am on Friday and 7am on Saturday. We didn't leave till after 10pm both nights.

Disney is a very special place for the husband. He grew up in California and spent many family vacations there. As an adult he loves to go back.

The first thing I decided to do today is to apply for U.S. citizenship. After 22 years of living in this country, it's time to naturalize.

The citizenship applications asks for much old paperwork to document my past. Every trip outside the country. Old divorces. Old fights. Where I have lived in the past five years. My husband's divorce. That night I spent in jail.

I don't like myself on paper. Or maybe it's just the shock of having old memories dredged up and aired in front of me.

I talked to my former boss, who coincidentally, left the mother company exactly one year ago yesterday. We talked about life after that career-- we were both at the mother company for over 20 years.

The old boss warned me that time would go quickly. He suggested I take some time to decompress before I make more plans.

I am getting inundated with messages from old coworkers, Curious. Wishing me well.

So what's new?

I am no longer an employee at the mother company. I've worked there for 22 years. I've been through so much there. Lately, it's been super frustrating and stressful. For months really with no end in sight. Sometimes the difference between stress and excitement is a deep desire for the battle.

Today we agreed to part ways.

This is a strange moment in my life. I have had a job full time schooling in my life since I was 15 years old. I am 49 now.

This husband is thankful that the stress has been lifted. He has a good job, and we have a good chunk of savings and investments. Materially we'll be OK. Maybe I won't retire when I'm 55, but there are worse things.

What's new...

The husband's mother was in town for a few days. We took her to a play, took her to a dinner circus and hosted a game night with some friends with her.

Fall is here. Looking over my past years blogs, I see that I post the return-of-fall every year. This year the return was sudden. One day it was sunny and warm. The next day it was cool, clouds with a lite drizzle.

A dear friend of the husband is in town for the weekend. We have been seeing the sights and eating too much. 

A wonderful Labor Day weekend.

This last weekend the husband and I went to a retreat for people in AA. This is the third time we've gone. The lodge that hosts the retreat is pleasant and tranquil. It's a great weekend away.

Talking to folks at the retreat has emboldened me to shake up my career. Maybe find a new job elsewhere. Many of the attendees are now living well, despite having burnt down their careers in past lives.

Either way, I've managed to reacquainted myself with a few old friends, including an old coworker who made the decisions that ended up with me (and others including himself) moving from Toronto to Seattle. It was good to catch up with him.

Casey died.

Years ago, when Yo was my roommate, he had a wonderful dog, Casey. I would take Casey on hikes up the small mountains around us. I enjoyed that so much. When we  came across a stream or pool she would run through the water all excited.

Of course she would also run through mud puddles all excited.

But she has aged. She had problems walking, cancer and vestibular disease. She died peacefully.

Our trip to Ontario has me thinking through the future.

What is to become of my parents? They don't want to leave the farm. They are capable of taking care of it now, but every time I'm there, it seems they have slowed down a little more.

We spent some of our time there doing the big chores. Chopping up trees that came down. Removing an old freezer that died.

They have too much food that they don't use. The fridge had year old, expired, salad dressings in it. Dad admitted that some of the frozen chicken in the freezer had been there for at least 5 years. I have a brother who lives more close to my parents. I'll ask him to regularly check these things.

The husband and I now have friends all over Ontario. It's a lot of work to visit when we go back. We can't have lunches, dinners or coffees with everyone. There are cousins that we are growing closer to. And old school friends.

One of the old school friends asked if we would retire to my original hometown. I didn't know how to answer. It's pleasant there in the summer. But, it could get boring and the winters are cold.

It could get boring... like I have an exciting life in Seattle. 

Mac has moved back to Seattle. It's made me very reflective. We were once best friends. Time, jobs and life moved us apart.

When I told the husband that Mac was moving back to Seattle, the husband quickly responded that he was in no rush to reacquaint us with Mac. We do live very different lives now. 

We are flying back from a week in Ontario. It was a hectic week, seeing sights and meeting old friends.

My brothers were in town. It was good to spend time with them as well as my parents. We spent a few days doing errands around our parents farm-- chopping wood, getting rid of appliances that don't work.

The cousins are off. They are now touring the mountains to the east. The Cascades and the Rockies. 

The husband and I flew to Sacramento for the weekend to visit his parents. They are both in their 80s and living independently. The husband would prefer they moved into a retirement home, but the parents aren't ready for that yet. 

Its hot here. Sacramento has been hitting 100F every day. We are spoiled with the pleasant weather back in Seattle. 

Gorgeous day today. I am chilling a bit while the husband naps. Enjoying the sound and scent of the breeze in the trees.

The husbands cousins from England have been here for a week. Lovely people. They are doing a tour with if the west coast. Its made the week busy though, with friends over, or events every night.

Drag Queen bingo was fun though.

Anyways, the cousins are taking a day trip to a local volcano while the husband and I catch up on errand and rest.

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We had a good weekend, though expensive weekend.

We finally got a BBQ hooked up at the house. When we moved in, we had a nice natural gas BBQ. But, the natural gas in the new house was not near the location where the BBQ needed to be. We got a couple of quotes for moving that natural gas-- $2000.00! For that price we could get a nice new propane BBQ.

Eventually we found a quote for $1300.00. Still expensive.

Friday the installer moved the gas. The bills was $1800.00 plus tax! We looked hard at the quote. He did write $1800.00 there, but his pen skipped a bit on the curve of the 8 making it look like $1300.

Sigh.

The BBQ is nice though.

Saturday we went looking for a new sofa. One store offered $9000.00 for a nice sectional sofa! Ouch Moving on the next store was selling a $21,000.00 sectional sofa. No features like a recliner or expensive leather. $21,000 was the basic model. It was nice to see, but $21,000.00

I'm not sure who the customer is for that. Maybe commercial? I'm thinking of a hotel lobby where you have dozens of people sitting down and getting up all day every day for years. That sofa would need to stay looking good after years of hard use.

Eventually we went to a chain store and found a sofa, chair & ottoman for less than a fifth of the designer sofa price.

Such is life in Seattle.

It's been a social 4th. We've attended events every day since Thursday. 

Thursday was a BBQ at Brown's. He has just sold his house, so it was a last hurrah before he moves. He is retiring and is moving to the nice, less expensive, place just a ferry ride away from Seattle. 

Friday I had dinner with my old boss and his wife. They are starting a new business as travel consultants for a large travel company. Things are starting. He knows the next couple of years will be a lot of work. But, they enjoy travel.

Saturday was the big annual pool party with the A-list bear crowd at C6 & J's. C6 has retired and has turned his house into a bit of a resort. There is much gorgeous landscaping at their place. It was great to catch up with everyone.

The Saturday party was important for the husband. He used to be very popular in this crowd. That was during his drinking and partying years. Now that he's sober he's isn't always comfortable in this crowd. It turned out well through. He had a good time.

Sunday was a Sobriety birthday party with Ray. It was a quiet event. There was plenty of cake. Success!

July 4

Happy independence day to all!

We are relaxing today, and heading to a BBQ later on. 

Boring or Chill.

I am ready for quiet time. The husband loves to book social commitments. He feel uncomfortable unless he has a few dinners and a trip or two on the calendar.

He doesn't want to be known as a boring person.

I don't remember the last time I was ever bored. I don't care if someone thinks I'm boring. As far as I'm concerned the past six months has had far too much drama in it-- the husband's hospitalization and recovery, our new house, my trip to Nairobi, to Bangalore, camping, trip to the coast. I'm ready to be boring for a while.

I've been obsessing, a little, over the TV show Schitt's Creek. We started watching it because our other shows ended, and Schitt's Creek seemed like a lite, fun, low commitment program to watch until we found something better to watch.

Season 1 was just that. Then, over season 2 it starts to develop some weight. The kids start to rebel against their parents by becoming slightly less terrible people.

Then in Season 3 a nice gay romance starts up. And I love this story. This is weird, but for the first time in my life I understand why someone would love a rom-com. There is no HIV subplot. There is no political rights angle. There is no coming-out-of-the-closet angst. There are just two men getting to know each other. The only thing that stands between them is their own baggage.

The levity of it all is a social statement in and of itself. The writers have created a small town where gay men can have a romance, and no one objects. Sometimes they have questions. But no one objects.
  

We have accepted an offer on our townhouse. The buyer hasn't backed out. This is good.

At work, when people ask me "How are things?" I've taken to responding "The usual amount of crazy." I'm not sure how else to respond without coming across as "Not a team player." It's not just me either. Many other managers that I talk to are also overwhelmed.

And it's not just "Overwhelmed, but if I work hard I can get through it." It's "Overwhelmed and I don't know where to start on these problems unless I talk to many different people." We are all so tightly interdependent on each other that no one can make a move without coordinating with too many other teams. Of course this means that the Directors have to be tightly involved in all this coordination to ensure the right things are happening.

I spend a good chunk of my week preparing for the weekly Director and Executive reviews. My main hope is that by doing this, my team can actually do real work. 

Our townhouse has not sold yet. I've just lowered the price by $15,000

Work has been chaotic. People are starting on vacations. We finished annual planning

The beach in the Pacific North West is only decorative. So says a friend. The water is cold. There is a constant cool wind. You won’t lay out in the sun or swim on the ocean beaches in Washington and Oregon. But what gorgeous decoration!

Last January, not anticipating the drama we'd have with moving, we booked a house on the beach for my birthday.

So now we are on the coast this weekend, with friends. The weather is gorgeous today. There has been rain and wind as well.

"Tommy" said...

Those must be the big green utility boxes in most subdivisions here... most people plant some plants near them to hide them.

It's exactly that. 

We did get their deposit. $15,000.00. Who walks a way from $15,000? Our mortgage broker said that this is the first time in his 25 year career that he's seen someone walk away from a deposit.

Energy box...

I know a little more.

The energy box is an access vault that the local electrical company uses distribute and maintain the power to our row of townhouses. It's in the common area in front of our townhouse. The vault was tested, and is well within safety limits.

The couple that was going to buy our townhouse have children that have some sort of hemoglobin issue that requires an extra margin of safety.

Yes, the truth here feels very thin.

When we originally accept the couples offer, we had a backup offer. Though that offer has expired, our agent thinks it came from a growing land lord that wants to buy multiple properties. The land lord may still be interested.

Old Townhouse

We planned to close on the sale old townhouse today. I was at the title office signing papers. The husband called me, very angry, and asking me to take him seriously. What he was about to tell me was not a joke.

At the final walk through the couple purchasing our home decided that there was a bad energy box too near the home. The bad energy wouldn't affect them, but they didn't want to raise their kids near it.

I have no idea what a bad energy box is. We are scrambling to figure out what to do. Worst case we will have to restage it and resale.

We should be able to keep their deposit. Restaging & reselling the house is a lot of work.

New house

The house sale closed today. We got the keys in the late afternoon. Carpet cleaners and handyman are running through it now. 

We are both very excited about her new home

Two days ago, on our walk-through, the house was in a mess. The previous owner had not cleaned or repaired the walls after taking down a lot art. It was a little frustrating to see our new house and such and unkempt state. But, elbow grease and good cleaners solve a lot of problems.

BD passed away yesterday. Last fall BD was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He went through chemo, but it was not successful.

The husband has been doing well. His gut has been behaving normally for over week.

We have sold our townhouse. We priced it right. It was a fast sale... open house last Saturday. We accepted a full price offer on Saturday night.

We close on our new house on Monday.

So much is happening now. We are buying a new house and selling our old. For some time we've been working with a real-estate agent to find a new house. We had a long list of criteria for the new house, so most months we wouldn't hear from him.

Then we did. It's a nice house in our neighborhood. It's about a ten minute walk away from where we currently live.

The husband is still off work. He's been using his time to prep our existing townhouse for sale. Because of this he hasn't been able to rest as much as he needs. He's not healing as fast as I'd hope.

Or maybe, his return to full health would be a long slog anyways. He has good days, and bad days. Good hours and bad hours.

My worry for him has increased. A month ago he was nicely recovering. Then he plateaued. He'd be fine for a few days. Then he'd experience a setback.

He continues to work with the doctors. 

I was in Nairobi Kenya for work, visiting our Nairobi office. I've also done a bit of site seeing...

Nairobi national park is right next to the city.

I've been to India a few times, so I'm used to the modern 3rd world experience. The international hotels in India, and our hotel in Nairobi were very similar. They both offer a 1st world bubble within their respective cities.

I was driving with a Nairobian coworker. We got into a small fender bender while merging in slow congested traffic. This happened right in front of a police officer. The first thing the policeman asked was "How much money do you have?" My coworker and the policeman negotiated a price.

Afterwards, the driver of the car that we hit gave my coworker the feedback that he should have negotiated harder with the police. Police corruption and bribery is just an expected thing.

The team at the office is great. Very young, but very eager to learn. I'm finding it hard to have long engaging conversations with the Kenyans. They are naturally quiet.

The weather is gorgeous this weekend. Cherries are blooming. Everyone is out sunning

The husband has had a bit of a set back. He now has a C. Diff. infection. He will be OK, but we are currently going through toilet paper by the crate. 

For now, we are out enjoying the sun.

All is well here. The husband is still at home, but will return to work soon. His energy is improving everyday.

The husband will leave the hospital later today. 

More of the story.

The husband developed a fever and cramps the night before we flew back from our vacation. We first thought it was the flu or food poisoning. The pain kept growing, so after we returned to Seattle, the husband immediately went to the hospital.

Quickly the doctors diagnosed the problem as diverticulitis. Diverticulitis is a condition where pouches develop in your lower intestine or colon and then these pouches get infected. It can be caused due to genetics (His mother also has it) It can also be caused by poor diet and lack of exercise. 

Saturday, they hooked the husband up to an antibiotic drip. Pain killers were kept to a minimum since many of them cause constipation. He was like this for three days. Constant fever and pain. Regular antibiotics.

Wednesday one of the diverticulitis pouches ruptured. The doctors decided to install two drains in him. Basically he now has two tubes exiting his stomach. Each tube has a vacuum bulb that slowly sucks out the infection. They are called JP drains if you want to check them out. 

The husband lovingly calls these two drains Thing 1 and Thing 2.

Within a day of the drain installation, the husband started getting better. His fever was gone within 24 hours. The pain subsided. He would still get a few cramps. They became bearable. 

By Saturday his sense of humor returned. He is also much more spiritual about the whole situation. 

Just today he had his first sold food in over a week.

Earlier I mentioned that the husband calls his drains Thing 1 and Thing 2. He talks about them as if they are pets on a leash. His movements must now be very intentional. Thing 1 and Thing 2 must not get caught on anything, or trapped, or squeezed when he sits, stands or moves around.  

He will leave the hospital later today. We are still learning about long term care. For some time he will rest at home. He will be responsible for administering his own antibiotics, and cleaning Thing 1 and Thing 2. 

A friend is staying with for a while, so the husband won't be alone while I work.