unexpected beauty

Tonight, at sunset, I saw a hawk flying. The hawk was high enough that the sun reflected off its bottom. It was beautiful.

Can you tell I've been drink in?

Housing updates...

We painted the deck last weekend.  It took two full days.

The upstairs shower is leaking into the downstairs bathroom. Shit.

Today is one of those perfect days that makes the nine months of rain worth it.

Today on my motorcycle, for the first time, I took a corner with such a lean that I scraped my side bords. Don't worry, this is fine thing. It means that I'm getting so comfortable with my bike that I'm capable of pushing it to it's limits.

Dog texting.

There is a man near me who slowly walks his dog two or three times a day. He plays with his smart phone the whole way.

My parents are gone. It was good to see them. We did lots of touristy things...

Watched paragliders
Went to the Seattle Art Museum
Watched fireworks from the top of a mountain. They weren't big and loud, but we could see every firework show accross the Puget Sound
Went to a vintage car show
Farmers Market.
Went to see the King Tut exhibit and then eat at El Gaucho.

My parents are in town for a few days. It is good to see them.

They are getting older. Mom has heart palpitations if she drinks too much coffee or doesn't sleep right. Dad's legs hurt him if he walks to long. He gets winded easily and wheezes often. I guess this is life. Is this also a hint of what could happen to me?

We went camping over the weekend. Of course it rained hard on Saturday. Thankfully the tent stayed dry.

Saturday was Stein's 40th birthday. We met up at the Third Door to celebrate. That night, blues rocker Alice Stuart was the headliner. When Alice heard that it was Stein's 40th birthday, Alice invited us back to her private rooms. We got to hang out with her band and entrourage! It was wonderful evening.

We fell a tree in our backyard today. Of course it fell at a 45 degree angle from where we wanted it to fall, so it fell on the neighbors yard where it got snagged on another tree.

We are back from our road trip. The drive was very uneventful.

This was a wondeful trip.

We are on the ride home. We made good time today and are now exhausted. It's 9:30PM and both if us are in bed.

san Francisco

Sent from my Windows Phone

San Frisco

Hwy 1

Sent from my Windows Phone

Pacific coast in CA

The hwy 1 is an awesome drive with endless beauty.

The brother and I are on a motorcycle trip to San Francisco. Today was a long day, we did 371 miles. Fortunatly, today was the longest day we will do the whole trip. It's all leasurly day trips from hear on.

Our first night we slept in Tillamook, OR. Second night, Eureka CA.

road trip...

Sent from my Windows Phone

Light house.

Road trip 2012

My brother and I are on a road trip down highway 101. first night we made it to Tillamook OR.

My birthday was over the weekend. Clem and Bates came over for steaks, wine and cake. It was a pleasant celebration.

Aside from that, the weekend was quiet. I ran errands. Cleaned the house.

Inside the truck there where house and van keys. We had to call a lock smith to rekey the house, the van and repair the truck lock.

Shitty day.

Over night I got a terrible tooth ache. When I left for the dentist in the morning, the truck had been broke into. They didn't get much, but they did make a mess of the lock.

Last night I took my bike out for the first time since I took the Motorcycle Safety course. I noticed a difference in my driving. I've become less sloppy while, cornering, breaking, starting or stopping.

I also took the bike out on the freeway for the first time. Driving at 65mph is a very different experience that driving at 30 or 40mph. The wind resistance goes way up, as does the noise.

I also noticed the power difference between the my bike, and the course bike. The course bikes were much lighter and had an engines about a 3rd the size of my engine. The small bikes are very nimble at slow speeds at stop signs and driveways. Mine requires a little more care.

Over the weekend I took and passed the Evergreen Safety Councel's Basic Motorcycle Safety course. When I took the course ten years ago, I failed. Passing was a big weight off my shoulders.

Yesterday evening was DR's memorial service. It was a very nice service. She volunteered a lot. Many of the organizations she volunteered for where there. We heard stories about her, her love of gardening, her no-nonsense attitude and her sense of humor.

It's made me think of my life. I've always planned my life by looking ahead. What do I want to do next? How do I want to grow? DRs memorial has made me ask "What do I want to leave behind when I die?" and "How do I want to die?"

At the memorial we realized we didn't know much about DRs life.  She had a nephew who didn't attend. While we heard about her volunteer work, we didn't learn anything about her family. We don't know why she moved to the city of Kent. Her businesses and home where in miles away in Seattle and Tacoma. Yet, for some reason, one day about 20 years ago she showed up in Kent and started volunteering. Everything was grateful she moved there. No one knows why.

Busy weekend. The weather has been georgous here. I most of the days outdoors, either hiking, on the motorcycle, working on the back yard.

Saturday evening we attended a Martini Party at the store. W, L & D were there. W has been writing and has published two mystery novels in the past year. L has also started writing again. She was laid off from work and now has much time on her hands. She hasn't written in years. She's a romance novelist, so she's starting again.

Sunday, the neighbors invited us over for hooka. A year ago, they visited the middle east. Bates fell in love with hooka machines. He likes the idea that a bunch of us would just hang around the table and smoke. It was nice, but I'm not in love with it. I still have the taste of hooka in my mouth.

DR died. I think she died alone. RO feels bad about this.

DR was an 80 year old woman who outlived most of her family. Se had one remaining nephew.

Five years ago she lived alone but was very active. She volunteered for many things and came to the store regularly where she helped out a little.

A couple of years back, her memory started fading. You had to watch over her because she would forget. Not long after this, her nephew moved her to an old age home.

She never really took to the home. She had few friends there and felt couped up. Even with her memory problems DR wanted to be active. The people in the home sat around all day, chatted and watched TV. When we talked to her last, she said she was just waiting around until she died.

We last saw DR over Christmas. We took her out to the men's choir for Christmas Carols. It was a pleasant evening.

Then the months slipped by and we didn't keep in regular touch with DR. At Easter RO dropped in to give her an Easter basket. But, he was too late. DR had died a month earlier.

RO feels bad about not keeping in better touch with DR. Her death has caused me to reflect on my future. I don't have kids or family to take care of me when I get old. Perhaps RO will be around, or perhaps not. Inevitably my body will decay, and I too will become a burden. I like to dream that I will be fit as a fiddle until I'm 90 when I will quickly and painlessly die in my sleep. But, that's not how it usually happens.

Today, Easter Sunday is a wonderful day. The weather is warm. The breeze is pleasant. The sun feels wonderful. I needed this. Its been cloudy and raining for too many months here in Seattle.

CJ/Rick said...I've thought for a couple of years that I would
like to have a bike. As a rider passed me on the freeway the other day, I
was wondering how long I could ride without back pain or leg cramps. Good
luck on your trip!

Cruisers can be comfortable. But yes, bikes can can cause cramps. You also get a right forearm cramp from holding the throttle.

Clem and Bates came over for dinner the other night. Of course we drank too much and had a great time.

My brother and I are planning a motor cycle trip down the coast. I'm a little nervous about this. I have never rode my bike for more than an hour at once. This trip will be 2000 miles and 10 days long.

To make work even more complicated, two guys on my team are having kids this summer.

This March is more cold than January. We've had snow twice.

At work, the strongest and most senior person on my team has told me he's leaving. I'm still digesting this news. So much counter planning has to happen.

It's been a year now since I started my health kick. I hike to Coal Creek Falls most every weekend. I stick with a slow-carb diet and eat very little sugar.

Currently, I've lost 25 lbs, 2 pant sizes and I sleep better than I ever have.

For all the snow, ice and flooding that has hit area, the last few days have been have been pleasant. There have been no power or internet outages at our home and the roads have been clean enough that we can come and go as we please. I consider myself fortunate. I have friends and co-workers who have been trapped at home for days with no power.

In the forest behind the house, every few minutes you can hear a large branch cracking and falling.

Seattle is bracing for a snow storm. Up to 8 inches in the next 24 hours. Most people have left work for home.

The last leg of my flight back home was cancelled. I'm stuck in Chicago for the night.

I am jet lagged. I slept off and on though the first half of the flight. So I can't fall asleep now. I still feel groggy. I didn't get much sleep last night. Maybe I can find some sleeping pills and knock myself out till the flight home.

Tonight was the extended family Xmas dinner. About 45 people showed up. Its difficult to remember them all.  I know all of the cousins, a quarter of their spouses and none of there kids.

It was good to catch up with everybody. Even though I share nothing in common with them, I enjoyed it very much.

At my parents, it's snowy and frozen. 10F if you'd like to know. Back home it's 55F.

Mom is in the hospital. Her heart was racing this morning. It does that from time to time. She will be OK.

She is supposed to rest more, but she's not good at that. Yesterday was the Family XMAS dinner. Rather than making Dad and I do most of the work. She pitched in and worked hard. Now she's paying for it today.

Dad said, that when her heart races, all she is supposed to do is to lay down and rest. However she is so high strung, that she can't rest. She has to go to the hospital, or the thought of it makes it worse.

Am visiting my parents now. I took a red eye into Toronto, spent the day with a few friends, and there kids, then drove up to my parents. The weather is very plesant here, though plesant for the Ottawa Valley means snow and just a little below freezing.

It's almost Christmas. The weather is very warm here. I've been taking the motorcycle out every weekend.

The fall leaves have washed away. Now the forests are green again with sword ferns and fir trees.

I've been feeling something new lately-- moments of peace or calm. Sometimes it happens on the motorcycle. Other times it happens when I'm walking along a stream, or just sitting and listening to good music. I haven't felt that for a long time.

The Uninvited...A few weeks back Sandy threw a pre-Thanksgiving party. We were invited and accepted. But then I got a call from Sandy. He Uninvited us! He was very apologetic but told me he needed the party to be very calm and RO was not a calm man.

I blew him off.

Then, weeks later, BIB and I were talking. BIB mentioned that Sandy invited him over for the pre-Thanksgiving party, but then called him up and uninvited him. An ex of BIB's would be there and Sandy needed the party to be calm, so rather than risk the drama, he un-invited BIB.

It was very weird.

We are having ä big winter rain. I had to do some last minute gutter cleaning and repairs, but that is finished now. My wet feet are being warmed up by the fire.

RO and I spent the last few days at a resort on the pacific ocean. It was windy and cloudy the whole time we were there. None this less, I had a great time. The resort had great food and a nice spa. And I discovered I can spend hours watching the waves roll in. Very peaceful.

It's RO's birthday today. We are heading to the ocean for a few days. It'll be the first time he's been away from work in a very long time.

The ocean in Washington State is not the pleasant paradise you'd hope it is. It's always cold windy rainy and cloudy. Take a look at this ad which spoofs our ocean beaches http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1XBOorGPE-Q

So, this will be a quiet vacation. Lots of hiking. I've also booked us in at a spa.

I've decided that I want to hike all the trails on Cougar, Squak and Tiger mountains. These are small mountains. If I stick to it, I should finish in less than a year. Cougar mountain is already mostly done.

Saturday, RO and I went to a wine and oyster tasting. It was a good experience. The manager said they shucked and served two dozen oysters per person.

We won the door prize-- gift cards and a good bottle of wine.

Andie and Erik are expecting a kid. They are having a baby boy, due in March.

When Andie and Erik got married RO and I wondered if it was a shotgun wedding. They were married last April. I guess March is out of the shotgun zone.

No rain this weekend. Instead it's sunny and cold. I hike up Squak Mountain on Saturday. Then on Sunday to Coal Creek falls. Afterwards I took the bike out for a ride. I got very chilled as I drove. My hands got stiff. Still, it was great.

This blog is eleven years old. I forgot all about it's anniversary. Facebook appears to be taking over from blogs. I haven't abandoned the blog for Facebook just yet, as the blog lets me write a little more.

Oh yeah, SJP, I know you read this. Say 'Hi' to me sometime!

I took the motorcycled for a ride today. Perhaps one if the last rides before winter sets in.

Its very relaxing to ride. Motorcycles are the opposite of automatic. You have to focus on its operation every second-- the manual transmission, the two breaks, the throttle. The speed of an automatic is self regulating. Hold the gas pedal steady and the velocity stays steady. Not so with a manual motorcycle. Constant adjustments are necessary for corners and hills.

Then there is the fact that a motorcycle's small profile means more drivers don't see you. So I also must focus on driving defensively and constantly plan the next ten seconds of my route to avoid the places a careless driver could stray into.

The result is that while I ride, all my day to day worries are pushed out of my brain.

At the end, when i get off the motorcycle, when I no longer need to focus or sit properly, I feel very relaxed and at peace.

Old Mail

RO and I have been cleaning out the house. We found a stash of four year old mail that we never dealt with. It was sent to this address but intended for the prevous owners.  There was a Christmas card and an anniversary card.

We tracked down the old owners, Bing makes that easy, and we had an interesting conversation.

The anniversary card-- the previous owners are now divorced. The sender of the anniversary card is dead.

The Chrismas card-- send from a couple that's now divorced.

Yo and his girlfiednd the Angel were laying in bed at the Angel's apartment in Bellevue. Outside they heard a drunk lady with an blackcent shouting at the top of her lungs.

Yo said to the Angel "What's a black woman doing in Bellevue?"

The Angel answered "Are you racist?" She was a bit offended that Yo would make such a comment.

As if prompted the black lady shouted "Am I the only black women in Bellevue Washington? Where are the other niggers! Certainly not here."

Yo kept his mouth shut.

Fall came so quickly.

A week ago, it was mid eighties and sunny. Today it is mid sixties and rainy. Typical Seattle fall weather.

RO and I have bought two rocking chairs for our front porch. Something to sit in with a nice wool blanked over your lap and enjoy a glass of wine wine while we watch the drizzle.

I am aware how old this makes me sound. I would say that I am growing happy with simplicity.

BIB and I went hiking today for the first time since early August. He was worried that he  couldn't make it up the mountain; that he lost his conditioning. He did just fine. He is dating a man. They like each other. Both of them are healthy and HIV+. I wish them the best.

My neighbor's car's windshield was getting cloudy. Not foggy on the inside. The glass was turning opaque.

He knew his insurance company paid to replace broken windshields but wasn't sure if it would do so for cloudy windshields.

So he smashed it with a baseball bat.

The weather has been wonderful here. I very much appreciate it. Last year, right after Labor Day, the rains returned. This year, it's sunny with highs in the 80s and overnight lows in the 50s. Perfect weather to be outside. Perfect weather to sleep.

Sunday, Clem and I went swimming at the local beach. There have been no life guards since Labar Day. None the less, the beach is packed with everyone having fun.

I got a nice new BBQ. An infrared one, on Tommy's advice. It makes wonderful rotisserie chicken.

Last night, RO and I went out for pizza and beer. We stopped in at the new bear bar. I many of the guys there where old acquaintances-- Behr, C4, J, L,S, people I haven't seen in a very long time.

About six months ago C6 had a heart transplant. He said he feels wonderful now. C6 carries a picture of the man whose death gave him his heart.

The problem with meditating is that half way through, I forget that I'm meditating. My mind wanders and by the end I'm thinking about dinner.

My barbershop now has a legal marijuana dispensery in the back. I know its legal-- when I asked the owner how business was doing, he told me how legal it was that his legal business could legally provide legal pot to legal customers after the customer legally presented a legal prescription that was legally checked by a legally licensed legal marijuana dispenser to treat legally approved conditions that only legal marijuana could treat.

The customers certainly looked like they needed legal marijuana. They all appear to be afflicted with that condition that causes bulging muscles in otherwise healthy young men. Until legal marijuana came along i think this condition could only be treated by regular trips to the gym.

I'm not anti-pot. I am concerned that the current laws don't do a better job of fostering personal integrity than the old.

I've read a bit more about medical marijuana in Seattle and now I understand his 'legal' response. Technically they are not allowed to sell marijuana. They can provide other medical services and they can accept donations. But, no pot for cash. Now his odd legal position makes sense.

Am home again. My parents place was wonderful-- fresh air, great weather. It just felt nice.

I'm at my parents now. It's been years since I've been here in the summer. My brothers and I are together for the first time in a very long time.

It's unbelievably pastoral here. Our dinners are made with vegetables and chicken all grown within half a mile of the kitchen. Dessert is berry pie, also grown on the farm. I can see why my parents love it here.

My parents are growing old. They act like they have accepted the fact that there bodies are breaking down, and that one day they will die. That's unsettling for me. I haven't accept that yet. I still believe they have years of healthy life ahead of them.

But maybe not. Mom has had heart trouble. Dad can't walk far without breathing heavily.

I've lost 15lbs and two pant sizes. I think it took four months to loose the weight. I never agressivly stuck with the diet. I was happy as long as my weight stayed the same or went down week over week.

This is the first time I've ever dieted to loose weight. I hope it doesn't come back.

We've kissed and made up.

RO and I have decided to end our relationship. Not much to add. We still have many details to work out.

Yo cooked dinner tonight, which I really appreciate. But, dinner was a half baked garlic & cheese potatoe with hummus and chips. He admitted that he forgot to think through the rest of the meal.

Good wine.

The weather has been great this week. I am taking my first week off in along time. Two years? I've been puttering around the house, reading in the hammock and going on hikes. A great vacation.

The weather has been perfect in Seattle. Sunny. Highs in the mid seventies. Overnight lows in the sixties. I've taken this week off work. We've spent a couple days on the peninsula on the water. I'm now home, in a hammock reading and composing my blog.

Summer is slowly eking its way to Seattle. While the rest of the country struggles with the heat, Seattle has been cloudy and cool. Most days we don't cross 70F.

I've been working on reviving a motorcycle. Its been sitting in the garage since 2006.

I've never ridden a motorcycle before. When Steven gave me his 93 cruiser, I decided to learn.

I have Yo as my guide. He worked in an engine repair shop, so he generally knows what he's talking about.

We are texting a lot. My motorcycle knowledge is small .

Me, "it has power, but it won't start."

Yo, "hold in the clutch. Its a safety interlock."

me, "duh..."

A few minutes later I managed to start the bike. But fuel was dripping out of it. I texted this to Yo.

He wrote back "hit the carburetor with a hammer."

"huh? why?"

"trust me"

it took me thirty minutes to find and get at the carberator, but after i did, and tapped it with a hammer, the dripping stopped.

yo was very impressed with himself when i told him it worked. Then he told me that carbs have a float that probably got stuck while the bike sat in the garage. Tapping the carb freed the float and closed the overflow hole.

I'm very impressed.

The yard

This summer I am putting extra special attention on the yard. Its becomming a great place to hang out. We had a campfire last night and made smores.

I've also bought a chainsaw and a leaf blower to help with the yard. We've cleared away alot of shrub trees with the chain saw and now have about a third more space.

Work is going well. I have two guys who work remote. One from Denver and one from Atlanta.  They were both in town this past week. So we did months of team building in one week.

The motorcycle.

Years ago Steven left his motorcycle in my garage. This spring, I've decided to revive the cycle, and start riding.

The years of neglect have taken there toll. The battery was bulging with corrosion and it took me over an hour to figure out how to remove it. This will be a fun challenge.

Hiking with bib

Bib and I hiked to coal creek falls today. I've been hiking there once a week by myself or with the dog. But bib wants to get into shape, so I invited him along.

He is clearly out of shape; he had to rest several times on the way up.  I think I was like that once. Now I can almost jog up cougar mountain to get to the falls. I recall that my first time needed plenty of rest breaks

I enjoyed my time with bib. I'll invite him again next week..

"I refuse to buy more than seven bottles of cheap wine in a week." I said that. It makes me sound like a heavy drinker. In my defense, six people help drink that wine. But still...

The Simple Pleasures of a Bonfire....

The twenty year old me would be horrified with the forty year old me.

Horrified? Maybe I mean profoundly bored. When I was twenty I dreamt of travel and never settling down. I didn't have great career aspirations. Yet hear I am at forty. I own a house in the suburbs. On weekends I take care of the yard. I like it that way.

Until last year, the yard was unruly and taken over by black berries-- viscous ugly vines. Over the winter I've got rid of the vines. Now it's wonderful space again. Kind of like park or camp ground.

This past weekend we made a fire pit and have been burning the fallen branches and other debris. I'm amazed at how much there is to burn and how pleasant it is to sit by the fire and with a beer and watch the debris go up in smoke.

Andie & Erik were married on Saturday. It was a fast wedding-- they met about six months ago. Two weeks ago we received the wedding invitation via email. Now they are married. I have to admire the minimalist efficiency they applied to their wedding.

The reception was wonderful. They rented a penthouse suite at a good hotel and held the reception in the suite's common area.

Is facebook taking over my blog? Maybe. There are still many things I'd discuss on this blog that I wouldn't discuss with my friends.

Spring is hitting Seattle. It's still raining a lot, but the grass is growing and the daffodils are blooming.

RO is having a bad time with insomnia. He has no problem falling asleep, but he wakes up at around 2am and stays awake till 5. Herbs, melatonin and sleeping pills don't seem to make a difference.

Mom is out of the hospital and doing well. Her heart still acts up from time to time, but mostly she's OK. She's seeing a good specialist this week.

RO and I have started regularly having drinks with the neighbors, Clem & Bates. It's a low key affair. Much easier than dinner. With dinner RO wants to clean, polish and put on a fancy dinner. But drinks-- just come over and we'll pour.

Last night, RO and I had dinner with Bib. It was good to see him. He brought over a Kahlua pie for dessert. We hate the whole thing and got so stuffed that our stomaches ached.

Mom has been to the hospital. Last Wednesday she found that her pulse would race to 150 beats per minute if she did any thing but lay down. She stayed in the local hospital for a few days. She is out and ok now. In a few days she is going to a heart specialist. They are considering a pacemaker for her. 

We were burgled.

I want to say we were robbed, but the police officer corrected me twice. Robbing happens inperson. Burgling happens when you are away from home.

Tuesday evening I came home from work. RO was relaxing. I started cooking. After maybe an hour, I went to our bedroom. Drawers were emptied out all over the bed and floor.

It really confused me. I went back to RO and asked him if he was looking for something in the bedroom.

He said "No."

I said. "This is important. Please come to the bedroom."

At that point it started to dawn on me that someone broke into our house. When RO saw the bedroom he realized the same thing. We called 911 and took a look around the house. Yo's room was also turned over. But the living room and office were untouched.

As near as we can tell, the theif took an Xbox 360, a watch and some cash. The weird part is that the thief left many valuables behind-- alcohol, art, jewelry, clothes, tools, a camera, laptops.

When the police officer came, he carefully took pictures and tried to get fingerprints. He mentioned that there were 3 other breakins in our neighborhood that day. They all had the same MO-- electronics and cash were taken, nothing else. The officer suspects it's a local school kid.

I'm not sure how I feel. It could have been much worse, it took an hour to clean up and I will miss the Xbox, but that's it. RO didn't take it well. He got very drunk and hasn't slept well since then.

I am going to get an alarm.

Yo. How he lives is interesting.

Sometimes he rents booths at trade shows and street fairs to sell dips, jerky and pet combs. He also sells them on eBay.

Sometimes he does head hunting for hospitals and clinics. Suppose a hospital needs a temporary RN for a few days or weeks. Yo will find one.

Sometimes he does teeth whitening. Spas will hire him to come in for a day to do on-site teeth whitening. Apparently it only takes a hundred bucks of equipment and no training to do UV teeth whitening. Any one can do it. But if you put the equipment on a nice cart, and dress up in a white lab coat, then spa customers will pay big bucks for it.

Two more things about the roomie.

He and his girl friend like to drink. Now, I've started drinking much more. For the past few nights, the four of us have polished off two bottles of wine a night.

He also sleeps around a lot. He has a friend who is a woman who also sleeps around. I hesitate to call her a girl friend. But they are friends, they also have sex together, but they aren't in a relationship. They both date other people on the side and then tell each other about it.

If Yo knows the girl is on a date he likes to text her nasty messages and send her pics of his dick.

The new roomie-- Yo.

What do I have to say about Yo? He's a friend of RO. He once owned a store near ours, which is how we met him. Yo's store closed. Now he works part time for our store.

After that, I really don't know much about Yo. He appears to be struggling... getting back on his feat after closing his store. That worries me. We've had a succession of roomates who have been struggling to get back on their feet. It always ends bad.

We have a new roommate. He has a very friendly dog, though the dog has spooked our cat. After the dog moved in, the cat stayed on our bed for two days before she finally resumed eating, drinking and using the litter box.

Bib was over for dinner last night. He's doing well, though he still runs himself down too much. He is staying home far too much because he's constantly worried about what people think.

It's been quiet here.

Back at home, my parents neighbor died. She baby sat me when I was growing up. When I was a teen, I baby sat her kids. I'll probably fly there for the funeral.

Merry Xmas everyone.

It's been a good holiday. RO got to see his son again-- first time in 13 years. He is very happy. I'm sure it's much for him to process as well.

We spent much of the day at RO's sister. Ate too much. Drank too much. Played party games. Argued about party game rules. But, we had much fun in the process.

LS & DR spent the day with us. They had no holiday plans.

The old people in my life are getting old. DR is 82. My neighbor M, is also in her mid eighties. Both of them are starting to forget things. Is unfortunate to see women who two years ago were so bright and active slowly slip into dementia.

I'm trying to figure out what my real job is at my day job. My offical title is 'lead' I have half a dozen people working for me.


Todate I've got by by being a good role-model and coaching them around that.


Now, some of my employees are *very* smart, and *very* hard working. I can't be a good role model for them. With a little more experience they will easily surpase my skills. Then where do I fit in?

Clem and Bates held there holiday party in a train car, a restored dome care from the '40s. Good food, good people. And, since Clem and Bates were hosting, there was too much alcohol.

Last night we had dinner with our neighbors, Clem & Bates. As usual, the food was wonderful and we drank too much.

Predinner martini's I always refuse to have more than one, yet Bates makes it happen.

"Oh no thank you. I don't want another martini."

"But I have have half a martini left in the shaker. Please take it!"

"Oh... all right."

Yeah, I'm weak that way.

Dinner is served with several bottles of wine. Then after dinner...

"No more wine for me thanks."

"OK! Let's switch to port."

Even if I am full, bloated, past of the point of nausea, if you put a jigger of port in front of me, I will drink it.

Earin is talking to us again. Earin was our roommate a few years ago. She got behind on her rent and then moved out before paying up.

Earin works near the store and stopped in. When she saw me she sat down next to me and said she wanted to make amends and pay me back-- in the new year.

I am writing this post from my cell phone. My day job bought me a fancy new phone and I am getting addicted to it. But, I am not using it productively. I am checking Facebook every 10 minutes and work email non stop.



Thanksgiving was nice. We had dinner with family.



Today is black Friday . Sales at the store are stong. I won't get my hopes up though.

Happy birthday babe!

This week has been busy. RO and Boone are working late every thing trying to reopen the store in the temp location.

At my day job we rolled out a new project tracking system. The result, of course, was much complaining.

Sometimes I wonder what kind of manager I am. I don't know what my style is. I work on what I believe is important, and I try to ensure that my team has good stuff to work on. But after that...who knows.

Even though I've only been lifting weights a few times a week for a little under a month, I'm starting to see a difference. I can bench press 20lbs more than when I started. I can complete more full bicep curls in a set without struggling.

Regular exercise also helps me focus at work. I'm less twitchy and more capable of sitting still. It also helps with sleep at night, again because I'm less twitchy.

It also helps me worry less about my health.

Tommy, have you got back to the gym yet?

RO and I spend Saturday afternoon in Everett, a navy and port city just north of Seattle. We went to see the Everett Fall Home & Gift show. The show was very small. We were in and out in under half an hour.

So we had lunch at a great pizza parlor and then walked along the water front. The winter rain is setting into Seattle, so I like to go for a short walk everytime there is a break.

Mark has had a chest cold for the past week. It's not getting better. At the same time, he's not so sick that he stays in bed.

I've started lifting weights, stretching and exercising. I find that if I regularly do so, then I sleep well.

For RO, sleep is a constant battle. If he takes sleeping pills he still wakes up for a few hours in the middle of the night. If he doesn't take sleeping pills then he tosses and turns all night. He'll finally fall asleep from exhaustion at around six in the morning.

For a long time I've tried to help RO sleep better. But, to little or no success.

10th Anniversary

The blog is ten years old. Happy birthday blog.

Let's see. What was I doing ten years ago? Hmmm. whining about my love life. Life has changed so much since then.

For me it is kind of fun to spot check entries from years past. I'm sure it's dreadfully boring for everyone else.

October 2005, RO and I were just opening up the store. Man-o-man. We thought we'd be hugely successful way back then.

I had a weak performance review at work. I'm not happy with it. But it's pointless to fight it-- that would be proof I'm looking towards the past and not planning for the future.

A weak performance review may not be the right way to describe it. I'm used to having strong reviews. Yet every time I was promoted, the competition around me grew stronger.

There is some truth to the Peter Principal. Sooner or later you reach the point where your peers are as smart and as hard working as you. Sooner or later you realise that not every one will make it to Vice President.

They've made it clear to me that my performance review is not a "Job in Jeopardy" review, but their assessment of my ability relative to my peers. Somehow, that is not that comforting.

Why do we procrastinate?

Sometimes I think it's self fulfilling. We hear from others how they put off work, or exercise and we subtly adopt those attitudes. Then we talk the same way, and that re-enforces those attitudes in others.

That may be an oversimplification.

I lifted weights today-- for the first time in a very long time. It felt good. And it's not like I put off anything fun to find the time to work out. I know there is lots of time in my life for me to exercise more. I end up watching TV instead. Bad TV. I don't enjoy most of the TV that I watch.

See how little sense my exercise procrastination makes?

It's the fall here in Seattle. Many big spiders are building webs close to warm buildings, trying to eat as much as they can before they lay there eggs and die.

In the back yard two squirrels are building a nest together. I didn't realize that squirrels could be social; in the summer they only fight. But there they were, both pulling leaves and twigs off an alder, and carrying it back to the nest.

One squirrel was very efficient, making a large leap from the nest to the alder, ripping off a large twig of leaves, and then leaping back to the nest. The other squirrel took a longer, more circuitous route to the alder, and brought back fewer leaves.