"These lessons that our parents are teaching us. This is not how you live." -- my brother-in-law
We are back home.
Thursday we drove the 13 hours from the in-laws to our place.
Things ended well my father-in-law. He seems to be happy in the new place. He is socializing a little. He is eating proper meals. He is taking his medications appropriately. His voice is a little more cheerful.
My mother-in-law is now considering her situation.
My friend C2 is fond of pointing out that decisions can be decisive, delayed, or desperate. The latter happening when you put off making hard choices, when you run out of time and end up accepting the only option on the table.
The seems to be what my father-in-law did. He desperately wanted to retain his freedom and to keep everyone happy. Maybe if he pushed the hard choices off a bit, then he would feel better. More energized. That's not what happened. He ended up unable to take care of himself in the hospital and needing someone to quickly move him.
My mother-in-law is also going down that path. The retirement homes she can afford aren't nice enough for her, so she keeps pushing off the decision. Most of the day she sits alone in her house. Her social circle have greatly shrunk due to COVID. She is on oxygen. She is too tired to drive anywhere or do things, especially in the heat of the north-central California summer.
I hope she makes a decisive choice.
In the future, I hope I make a decisive choice.
We are back home.
Thursday we drove the 13 hours from the in-laws to our place.
Things ended well my father-in-law. He seems to be happy in the new place. He is socializing a little. He is eating proper meals. He is taking his medications appropriately. His voice is a little more cheerful.
My mother-in-law is now considering her situation.
My friend C2 is fond of pointing out that decisions can be decisive, delayed, or desperate. The latter happening when you put off making hard choices, when you run out of time and end up accepting the only option on the table.
The seems to be what my father-in-law did. He desperately wanted to retain his freedom and to keep everyone happy. Maybe if he pushed the hard choices off a bit, then he would feel better. More energized. That's not what happened. He ended up unable to take care of himself in the hospital and needing someone to quickly move him.
My mother-in-law is also going down that path. The retirement homes she can afford aren't nice enough for her, so she keeps pushing off the decision. Most of the day she sits alone in her house. Her social circle have greatly shrunk due to COVID. She is on oxygen. She is too tired to drive anywhere or do things, especially in the heat of the north-central California summer.
I hope she makes a decisive choice.
In the future, I hope I make a decisive choice.
1 comment:
I fear I will not be able to make those choices when the times comes. I hope that times comes in a way that eliminates some of those choices. Time will tell.
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