It's been a busy labour day weekend for us. 

The husband's cousins are here. They are a wonderful retired couple who do a lot of traveling. This is their first trip to the U.S. since before the pandemic. 

They arrived a few days ago and are staying for the next week. After that they will head off on a roadtrip and visit their friends and see the sights up and down the coast.

Friday I helped move C2 to his new apartment. He moved down one floor and to the other side of the building. The new apartment should be a bit more quiet. The move was straightforward. He moved all the small stuff the previous day. All we had to do was to move a sofa, mattress and table.

Saturday, we drove the cousins to visit the mother-in-law. The cousins and the brother-in-law went to a Husky's football game.

Sunday we had a BBQ for the husband's family.

Monday, the brother-in-law hosted a small party for a friends at his rowing club.

We had a great time in Whistler BC. We spent the time with our friends G&J, and their kids. We hiked. We did the touristy things-- zip lining, bob sledding, ATVing, after dark light shows. 

And we ate too much ice cream

We are off to Vancouver and Whistler for a few days. 

Part of this is to recelebrate our 5th year anniversary. Officially our 5th anniversary was back in July, however we were quarantining from each other at that time so it didn't happen.

We also bought new wedding rings for each other. A bit about that-- we always buy cheap wedding rings and then change them up every couple of years. 

The first rings were tungsten rings that got for about $15 each on Amazon. After a couple of years, I accidentally dropped mine and it shattered. 

So we bought a couple of stainless steel wedding bands for maybe $10 each.

A few weeks ago the husband suggested that we upgrade our wedding bands. Titanium bands are nice. We just spent $14 each for our titanium bands, and maybe ten times that for a celebratory dinner.

> I had to look that up. Thought that I hadn't heard of something. Then I realized there was a typo. Hopefully, all your symptoms disappear, and you are not straddled with long covid.

Sigh. Typos. Spelling has never been by strong suit.

I don't think this is long COVID. I have my taste. I have my regular energy. No brain fog. I'm just congested. And thinking positive.

Today we home tested. The husband tested negative. I have a very faint band indicating I am still positive.

...and I just learned that the mother-in-law has fast growing cancer. We will get more details in the next few days.

Quiet weekend for us recovering from COVIDs lingering effects. We were originally going to go to a Mens Addiction Recovery Retreat, however we are still both congested. My energy has returned and my throat is no longer sore. The husband is still low energy and having coughing fits.

> It is hard to take covid seriously when it has never affected me. I cannot believe I have not been exposed to it by now.

Covid seems to be a very random disease, which makes it hard for the lucky or fortunate to take it seriously.

With the flu-- you know what you are in for. You may have a lite flu, or a tough flu, but the symptoms are never too different. So everyone understands the flu. You don't gamble with the flu. 

Covid is all over the map. Some are nigh immune to it. Some have a scratchy throat for forty eight hours. Others are flat on their backs for a week. *And* it changes. The first time you have covid, you may have it easy. The second time hard. It's much more of a gamblers disease and that means the gamblers amongst us will treat it way different than the risk adverse. 

Right now the husband is very sick with his COVID. He needs morning and afternoon naps. He has coughing fits.

My recovery is a few days ahead of his. I am a bit tired and I still have a scratchy throat. I'm not having coughing fits and don't need naps.

>That sucks getting Covid on the cruise. I hope it passes quickly for you.

On the plus side, this was my first cruise where I have lost weight.
I'm attending work today, but what is work for me but sitting in a comfy chair all day, and chatting with people on a zoom screen.

By and large, we enjoyed our time in Alaska. 

I hesitate to say how my covid is. The symptoms seem to change every hour. This hour I don't have a fever. I'm a little tired and sometimes have coughing fits.

The husband also has covid and is the thick of it. He has a fever, coughing and is achy.

As if on queue, I develop a headache.

And I have COVID. No one to blame for that but myself.

I seem to be going through it quickly. Yesterday I had chills, was tired and slept a lot. Today my energy has returned though I am a little congested. I am spending most of my time in the cabin. 

We are on an Alaskan cruise with a few of the husbands old friends. I'm enjoying myself. So far the weather has been great. 

I'm trying to use the opportunity to reset my internet habits. The internet is slow here. Txt works. Email works. Pictures and videos, not so much. I'm using the time to read, to write and to just stair at the ocean and contemplate the passing of time. 

We are having our house painted. The instructions to the painter were to paint it with exactly the same colours as it was. Of course the paint isn't turning out that way. It's a little darker. A little less saturated. Or maybe not. When its not in bright sun it looks a bit warmer. The painter can point to the pain cans and show us its the same spec as what we gave him.

This is stressing the husband out a bit. I want to support the husband, but I'm not that emotionally in tune with subtle shades of colour. As long as its not garish, then I'll be fine. 

I don't want to put all of this on the husband though. He does have better taste than me. 

Tuesday, I had dinner with C3. Tacos at a local gay bar. I try to have dinner with him regularly. He lives in a trendy area of Seattle. It's fun for me to get out of the suburbs-- to see the hip & cool kids. 

C3 is waging war on the pigeons that visit his balcony. He has a bird feeder there and enjoys watching the small birds eat at it. On the other hand the pigeons chase off the small birds and make a mess.

His solution has been to build a Rube Goldberg of a cage around the bird feeder. The cage is made of odds and ends found around the house-- plastic tubs, bits of metal, duct tape. The holes in the cage are big enough to let the small birds through, but small enough to keep the pigeons out. 

The pigeons constantly pry at the cage to pull it part and gain access to the food. He responds by rebuilding the cage with more duct tape and stronger odds-and-ends.

I asked him why he doesn't buy a pigeon proof bird feeder. They are not that expensive. He responded that he's moving soon and he doesn't want to buy anything more to move.

C3's lease expires soon and he's looking for a new aparment. His apartment overlooks a loud and busy park-- there are always people there playing basketball, skate boarding, baseball, sometimes cricket. He wants an apartment that is more quiet.

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At work, my manager has been promoted. My manager asked me if I wanted to apply for his job. He is looking for a replacement. In the past I've said I'm not interested in that job. It's more administration, more stress and less direct engagement with our business problems.

I talked this over with C3. His blunt response was "Why wouldn't you apply?"

This morning I threw my hat into that ring. We'll see. I'm trying to not be emotionally attached to this. There are good reasons to hire a fresh outside candidate. There are also good reasons to hire me.

Yesterday, for the first time in weeks, the husband and I had sex. It was good. The husband cried a little afterwards. I think he was relieved-- that our relationship is headed in the right direction.

My mother has had her latest call with the oncologist. Positive news. Her last scan shows some swelling in the area around the tumor, but that's not uncommon. She'll have another scan in three months.

The husband is keeping busy during his travels-- hanging out with friends. Buying cheap tickets to musicals. I'm happy for him.

For the past few days, I have been in San Francisco for work. It's largely a moral and team building event with dinners, parties and and a harbor cruise. 

Hundreds of people flew in for Tuesday and Wednesday. The offices were busy. Most people have returned home. I'm staying for an extra day. Of course the office is quiet again. I have the 24th floor of our building all to myself. 

This floor as an expensive espresso machine. Allegedly $15,000.00. I want to make some coffee with it, but the buttons are all obscure icons. I'll youtube some training videos later.

Over the weekend, our HOA hosted it's first neighborhood get-together since before the pandemic. It was nice to meet many of our neighbors for the first time.

Today is my second last day in Ontario. My brother and his wife left yesterday. Baring any disaster at the airports, I should be home Saturday night.

The husband picked up an STD during his relapse. It's all treatable. He and I must have much deep conversation about our relationship. He is humiliated about the relapse and is punishing himself. He is also being very open and honest with me. 

I have no urge to have a revenge trick. Between the husband's bad experience, and C2's stories about his hookups, I have no desire to go down that path.

So, what does it look like to repair my relationship with the husband? 

I now have access to mom's medical file and can see the details. She has Alzheimers and lung cancer. The cancer is slow and hasn't spread. It will be a few weeks before we meet with the oncologist to discuss next steps. That last part is frustrating. Her previous oncologist has left that hospital.

The husband is taking his relapse seriously. He is working closely with his sponsor and keeping himself busy-- meetings every day-- proper self care.  I have to let him do his thing. There is nothing I can do to help him stay sober.

My family and I are reflecting on mom and discreetly discussing how to manage her care. She looks healthy despite the radiation treatment. I hope she beats the cancer. We can only manage her Alzheimer's. What does the rest of her life look like?

I am also catching up with hold high school acquaintances. Some of them are talking about stepping back from work. Not retiring, but working less aggressively. 

One, a real-estate agent, said she her work is dawn-to-dusk, seven-days-a-week. The is affecting her relationships and her health. She is stepping back from real-estate to find something new.

Another couple, who has always run multiple small businesses, saw some of their business go-away at the start of the pandemic. Their other businesses grew and could largely be run remotely. 

This fall they will try RVing for few months to see if they enjoy it. The husband is looking forward to it, but uncertain. He's not good at sitting still or driving for hours-- at the start of the pandemic he stress-built a new wing on their house because he needed something to do.

Saturday, I tracked down another high school acquaintance. We are both children of farmers and sat at the same table during home-room.

Recently BH has had some medical issues. A blood vessel kept leaking in his brain. The surgery to address that appears to have been successful. He is now recovering at home.

While BH is recovering a cousin of mine is helping around BH's farm. My cousin suggested I talk to BH-- BH has nothing to do during the day and would appreciate the company.

It was good to catch up with him. We are *very* different people. Very different life experiences. BH mentioned that I seem to be good at talking to people, something he's always struggled with. BH runs a very successful farm-- a life I intentionally moved far far away from decades ago.