Dad recently secured a funeral package for both himself and mom. For the purchase, he invited my brother and me to accompany him. I think he wanted some support from us, however the atmosphere was more of a pleasant chat rather than a somber discussion. The funeral director made a good effort to keep the mood light.

This particular director has worked with our family before. He was familiar with the peculiarities of our family names. Notably, my father, like his brothers, lacks a middle name. These details prompted a conversation about the traditions and reasons behind naming children.

When asked, "Where were you born?", Dad's birthplace in the Netherlands steered our discussion towards the distinction between Holland and the Netherlands, as well as the history of Dutch immigration in our region.

It doesn't help that some of my relatives go by different names depending on the context. "That's Jane. But she's known as Yane when speaking with someone Dutch. And if she's conversing with someone from Friesland, she goes by Yanke."

There's a depth of family and history here that I don't feel in Seattle. Such sentiments might be rare in many places. Over dinner, one of my cousins mentioned how his wife initially felt overwhelmed upon meeting our expansive extended family. Our ties span multiple generations.

When my husband met the family, he wasn't overwhelmed; I believe he was more suprized and then charmed. He has a few cousins, an uncle, and an aunt. While they maintain contact, they're spread out across the country.

I have somewhere between forty and fifty first cousins. Whenever the Husband and I dine with one of them, we sometimes find ourselves explaining our relationship to him for clarity: which uncle, which aunt, and even which farm they're associated with. The geography helps clarify the relations as my mothers family is more to the south and my father's to the north. 

As I grow older, I appreciate the family more. I might not want to retire or be buried here, but there's something special about this place.