1. Friday I had a root canal. It went well. No pain now.

2. We feasted on Thanksgiving. Wednesday, the brother-in-law, H and the husband started prepping for dinner. Thursday they cooked it all up. I swear we had enough food for 12 people-- a cheese and veggie tray and deviled eggs to start, then turkey, candied yams, brussels sprouts, mashed potatoes, mac and cheese. Pies, brownies and tarts for dessert. 

We did not need all that food. It am very thankful to be leaving this way, with good friend, in the middle of a pandemic. 

The husband has already bought and wrapped my Christmas gift. He is very thoughtful like that. My brain is more like... hmmm... the holidays are coming up... o yeah... Christmas... should I get gifts for people?... I hate shopping... 

I developed a toothache over the weekend. I'm about to head into the dentist to see what's going on. 

 

Wind and rain today. The gardener is having one last go at the back yard before winter sets in. We've removed the hanging plants. We've cleaned and refilled the hummingbird feeders-- some humming birds, Anna's, will stay here year around.

The state is locking things down again. Covid is spiking. We've started buying larger batches of grocers so we won't go to the store so often. H, our room mate, rushed to get one last workout in before her gym closed due to the lock down. 

The brother-in-law is sober now. Since he arrived, he's been sitting on the sofa. Sometimes watching TV. Mostly contemplating his life.

Why does he want to drink... why is he driven to drink, even when he is past the point where he has lost his job, where his drinking is causes serious health problems? Why does he need someone there to stop him from drinking more?

1. The brother-in-law got out of detox a few days and proceeded to start drinking again. Today he called the husband, asking for help.

The husband and H are responding to the call. They will pick up the brother in law and drive him back to our place.

I don't understand addiction. I've never had problems saying no to alcohol or drugs. And yet, I'm married to a man in AA. Many of my friends are also members. 

Perhaps I should attend Al Anon more regularly. 

2. The brother in law is here now. He is looking rough. He is drunk. 

 The time is going by. Work is intense by day.

Did I mention... the husband got a promotion. I'm happy for him. His work has ramped up as a result though. 

The brother in law is in a mental health center detoxing, being counseled. He is in good spirits and talks to the husband at least once a day. 

He seems to have these meltdowns every year or so. He has for as long as I've known him. It's my hope that this time he will be cured. Maybe we are expecting too much from him-- that this time he will stay sober. 

Maybe I have to accept that, from time to time, the brother in law will hit a low. All I can do is love him for who he is.

 

This pic was taken as the sun was rising. It gave everything a warm glow.

The night of the election I slept poorly. It talked to H about it. H is a friend who is a black woman. H said she slept well. Her opinion is that the election won't change things as much as I think. She is probably right. This is all a good reminder of the serenity prayer.

 1...

We are at peak fall now. The days are sunny. The leaves have changed colour and are starting to fall.

The brother in law has fallen off the wagon-- in a big way. The husband is struggling with this. He is angry at his brother and won't rescue him.

2...

The husband himself is doing well. He just got a great promotion at work. A new team and a substantial raise with it. 

3. Halloween was quiet. Two families dropped by. Last year over a dozen did. The city asked families to not trick or treat, so I'm not sure why these two families did.

We ate most of the Halloween candy. I loved it. 

3. The election... the election... will it be crazy. Will it be fine. Seattle has asked stores in protest zone to lock up well by end of business tomorrow. Some stores are boarding up.

The rest of Seattle... it's all good. We are having dinner with a few friends tomorrow to watch the results.

4. I just Ubered the Brother in Law to the hospital. He is unable to stop drinking. He asked the Husband for help.